Thursday, March 29, 2007
I've almost recovered from last weeks winning streak coming to an end, but just in case, I have a syringe full of Stroh rum, in case the Sharks decide to fuck me over again. I'm not too worried though, while having put up quite a show this year, the Force don't have what it takes to beat the Sharks. A more pressing concern is the Hurricanes Vs. The Bulls. I so fucking need the Bulls to strap their shit, and win this game. If another Kiwi team sneaks into the top 4 I will crap my pants. I've been working on a bit of an apocalypse theory. Basically I've concluded that the worst case scenario for the year of our Lord 2007, is if, in this order, The Blues win the super14, NZ win the cricket world cup, the All Blacks win the Tri Nations, and then the All Blacks win the the world cup. Have you ever seen an entire country simply explode with its own sense of self worth? If all of those events transpire exactly as mentioned, the two islands of New Zealand will erupt into a supernova of tears and semen, which will set off a chain of astrological events that will bring an end to life as we know it. I don't mean to place too much pressure on The Sharks and the Bulls, but by snatching the Super14 title from a Kiwi team they will be directly responsible for saving the world. Right now they're like Bruce Willis and Ben Affleck and the other astronauts in Armageddon (which won the Oscar for most awesome movie ever, by the way.)
The Chiefs Blues game is another shining example of a chance for world order to be restored. Don't get me wrong, I don't Like Hamilton, or Hamiltonians for that matter, in fact I'd rather get teabagged by Lawrence Sphaka and Ollie Le Roux simultaneously than spend another minute there, but by beating the Blues, The Chiefs will rob them of vital points, opening the way for an SA home semi. The Last game this weekend is the Lions v The Brumbies. The Lions have become like that opening band you see before a Concert, not why you came or releveant to the over all outcome, but a pleasant surprise that gets you foot tapping. I hope they beat the Brumbies, if only to exact some revenge for last week. I now hate the Brumbies, but I'm a pretty hateful guy so that's just one of many.
On a side note, I am the only contributor to this site, I am the emperor, I am the master and I am the King. And while my one-sided contemptuous narrative fills me with much glee. I have decided to open my kingdom and accept differing opinions. I will allow someone to, I suppose, guest post on my blog. I think it's important to allow divergent opinions to be broadcast, other wise we'd be no better than the commies, and look at them now. So if you feel like it, you may submit a story or round up or porn or anything really, to counterruck@blogspot.com I retain editorial privilege but I am easily pleased.
Read or Post a Comment
<< Home