Sunday, February 11, 2007

Weekend Roundup


Another week, and though slightly less dissapointing, still not great. All I want is exciting rugby, wingers scoring tries, centers breakling lines, New Zealanders Losing (at least I got some of that this weekend.) But it's still a long way to go and I suppose I should be thankful that the Sharks are still unbeaten.

Crusaders 33 Reds 22
This was probably the closest it got to a descent game, but since it was an Aus and Nz team I spent most of the night staring at the bar girls' rack rather than the projector. For what it's worth, that was entertaining too. Still the Crusaders were always going to win this one, no surprise.

Stormers 3 Western Force 22
I'm trying to make sense of this, but I am failing. How can a team that on paper looks the strongest (except for maybe the Sharks) and have a wealth..... neigh, a Cornocopia of Springbok talent in their squad, fail to score a single try, AND concede 22 points to a team of nobodies. I am speechless. Look, all I can say is that this is like the beginning of a Rocky movie. He loses, and loses and then due to some life changing event, turns things around and wins the love and admiration of everyone while teaching his oponent a valuable lesson in humanity. So expect a thrilling finale with lots of pumping music, and an oscar to follow.


The Sharks 22 Waratahs 9
This was a pretty good game, I'm still not happy with the ammount of useless kicking downfield, and the terrible option taking. What I am happy with is the defence, At the risk of karmically fucking my team, I'd like to compare this years Sharks to this years' Bears team in the NFL. Not the greatest offensive line in the world, but entirely capable of winning games on defence. And for the record they do not posess a sex cannon (thank God).
Oh and P.S. somebody listened to my request, and brought back the push-up guys. For my next request, I'd like the sharks girls to jello-wrestle naked at half time. Thanks in advance .

Chiefs 32 Hurricanes 39
 yeah, not bad, I knew Tana would ultimately be the difference between this and last weeks' 'Canes his innate Tana'ness just seems to elevate the 'Canes. But you know what, I'm seeing a lot of cracks in the NZ teams. The loss of their stars must be a huge psycological blow. Oh well, maybe we'll get a few wins in, and the kiwi's have a reason to moan. everybody wins.

Brumbies 15 Blues 17
The Blues are looking pretty good so far, only them and the Sharks remain unbeaten, and unlike the Sharks, the Blues had to do it against the Crusaders and Brumbies both past Super Rugby winning teams. I think they might end up being a handfull. One thing is for sure, if the Blues do make the finals against an SA team, It will be a cosmic anomally where 3/4 of New Zealand will suppport an SA team, and in doing so will rip hole through time and space. Thanks again New Zealand, Love your work.

Bulls v Cheetahs
Just Like I thought, tough forwards scrapping for ball while the backs looked average. Both teams have such incredible talent in the loose that I can't see too many teams run over them. It has to be said though, what a try by Habanna. Does it make up for a years' worth of mediocrity? probably not, but it was great to watch. I can't wait to see what these two monsters do to the Australasian teams. Remember the last time Ritchie McCaw ran into Richard bands? Neither does he.



Lions 11 Highlanders 6
Well, Well, Well. Look who decided to show. I mentioned that when the Lions win, it's a bit like finding money on the street...... then winning the lottery......... then hooking up with Scarlett Johansson. Not the same level of awesomeness, but the same level of unlikeliness. That is, unless the opposition flyhalf actually gift wraps the win, sends it via registered post, and then calls you up to ask if you received it ok. Callum Bruce had about as bad a game as any human being had in the history of time. Yes his kick offs were a bit short, and his kicking out of hand a bit inaccurate, but missing a pass from your scrumhalf, only for the ball to hit you square in the face? That is karma telling you it really doesn't like you. I suspect that immediately before the game he burned down an orphanage or something. because no man can be that cosmically cursed. If the Lions beat the Crusaders next week,I'm cancelling my insurance, because we are surely on the eve of the apocalypse. (Who am I kidding?........ I don't have insurance.)


Last Though. My God, did you see the Lions cheerleaders? no wonder Callum had such a bad game. In a straight choice between staring at the incredible half naked FeLIONS (not my word by the way) or concentrating on catching and kicking, well... lets just say I would let my scrumhalf's balls hit my face all day long. (Hang on ...What?)

Posted by CounterRuck @ 7:08 PM