Monday, December 18, 2006
2007 Super 14 preview (A.K.A shit that probably wont happen)
To me the super 14 season is allot like sex, I start off all excited and nervous and go in with the best of intentions. Half way through I get terribly concerned over my guys' performance, and in the end it's over before it should be, and I'm left alone and miserable having learnt new sad things about myself. But this year will be different.
First I'd like to look at the South African teams, surprise. On paper we have some of the greatest teams in the tournament, stop laughing, I'm serious. The Bulls have the kind of game plan where they win games using only 2 props a hooker, one flank, one number 8 and a Flyhalf. The other guys just dance around doing fuckall, consequently they don't actually know what to do with the ball when they do see it.
First I'd like to look at the South African teams, surprise. On paper we have some of the greatest teams in the tournament, stop laughing, I'm serious. The Bulls have the kind of game plan where they win games using only 2 props a hooker, one flank, one number 8 and a Flyhalf. The other guys just dance around doing fuckall, consequently they don't actually know what to do with the ball when they do see it.
The Cheetahs are the ultimate Hollywood underdog team. A team of rag tag nobodies, lead by an inspirational leader, with a young coach up against the odds. All held together by nothing more than pure heart. They will go through the season being tested at every turn which will only bring them closer together, and show everyone who doubted them that blah blah blah... then they get stuffed by the Crusaders. draw curtain
The stormers are a bunch of overpaid prettyboys, and I used to love them above all. Facts however speak for themselves. If they can bring what they had in the curry cup with them, then we may see a different team. Until then I remain sceptical and somewhat amused, and a little hungry.
The Lions, the poor Lions. They remind me of that kid in High School who broke his leg, while getting stung by a bee, in the process of picking up his books, that fell out of his bag as he was getting molested by a donkey.(Thats a true story by the way, you know who you are.) They just cannot catch a break. I can't help but feel that in a previous life the Lions brunt down a kindergarten and Karma is fucking them in the ass.
Then there are the Sharks. I honestly believe we have found our first real contender to a super14 title. They have a solid front row (nothing more, nothing less). The have, not one, not two but THREE quality flyhalves. The Bob is back. AJ Venter is still the hardest thing under the African sun. And yet even without all of that, they have the wunderkind Francois Steyn. If he does not turn out to be the greatest rugby player since Willie John mcBride then I will eat my copy of EA Sports Rugby 2006, (turns out I still have some room left after making a similar bet involving EA Sports Rugby 2005 and Jorrie Muller, bastard)
I'll get to the Kiwi and Aus teams later. but i think we can all agree that Bikini Bullriding is the greatest sport of all time (Wait, where was i going with this....?)
The Lions, the poor Lions. They remind me of that kid in High School who broke his leg, while getting stung by a bee, in the process of picking up his books, that fell out of his bag as he was getting molested by a donkey.(Thats a true story by the way, you know who you are.) They just cannot catch a break. I can't help but feel that in a previous life the Lions brunt down a kindergarten and Karma is fucking them in the ass.
Then there are the Sharks. I honestly believe we have found our first real contender to a super14 title. They have a solid front row (nothing more, nothing less). The have, not one, not two but THREE quality flyhalves. The Bob is back. AJ Venter is still the hardest thing under the African sun. And yet even without all of that, they have the wunderkind Francois Steyn. If he does not turn out to be the greatest rugby player since Willie John mcBride then I will eat my copy of EA Sports Rugby 2006, (turns out I still have some room left after making a similar bet involving EA Sports Rugby 2005 and Jorrie Muller, bastard)
I'll get to the Kiwi and Aus teams later. but i think we can all agree that Bikini Bullriding is the greatest sport of all time (Wait, where was i going with this....?)
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